SBS is marketing – sorry, marking – the return of its record-breaking survival series Alone Australia with the launch of a ‘limited edition, unisex fragrance’, Alone Cologne.
A spokesperson for the broadcaster said the scent was ‘not for the faint of heart’. Nor is it – to the understandable disappointment of those of us keen to drench ourselves in ‘a riot of untamed, unforgiving and unpleasant notes’ – actually available for sale.
The campaign has been created in collaboration with creative agency and production company Jack Nimble, who worked with acclaimed perfumer Ainslie Walker.
Read: SBS’ Alone Australia brings us together in the wilderness
The SBS spokesperson continued: ‘Inspired by the realities faced by the brave souls on Alone Australia Season 2 in the depths of the New Zealand wilderness, the fragrance is real, raw and ripe’. The scent, they say, has been designed to be a ‘riot of untamed, unforgiving and unpleasant notes to transport those who smell it into the wild and untamed world experienced by the series participants’.
Walker described the cologne as having ‘stale notes of campfire soot, rain-soaked dampness and earthy moss. This is followed by overwhelming notes of rotten game flesh, which sing in harmony with smoked fish skin, unwashed skin and greasy hair. This pungent prelude is followed by a serenade of soured sweat and halitosis, bodily fluids and a light after-whiff of the New Zealand wilderness.’
And, wait, you’re telling us we can’t buy this for ourselves and our loved ones? Come on!
Read: Alone Australia 2: meet the contenders
Alone Australia Season 2 premieres on 27 March on SBS and SBS On Demand.